thank you!

hey hey!

thank you all for the tips/advice you gave me on my last post. i just want to make a few things clear. i’m not suffering from an eating disorder. i understand how that may sound…as if i’m in denial. but truthfully, i am by no means struggling. i don’t want there to be any misunderstandings here. when i lost that weight about a year ago, it was not my intention to lose that much. i never had a goal to drop weight so drastically. what happened is that i became obsessed with health, and got too caught up in eating very “purely.” the foods i was eating (rice, beans, plain yogurt, steamed vegetables, fruit, nuts and nut butters, cereal…yes, i still ate both nuts and cereal) were simply not adding up to enough calories. i was unintentionally starving myself. i didn’t realize that being so “healthy” could actually be unhealthy. all along my intentions were focused on health, not emaciation. it came as a shock to me that my plan to get healthier was backfiring. when my low weight became a serious issue, i slowly began to change my ways. since then i’ve been able to successfully maintain. i’ve just had trouble gaining. i never knew it could be so hard! anyway, thank you again for dropping me some notes. all thoughts are welcome here (as long as they’re nice.)

in regards to the period question…i did lose my period from losing the weight, but got it back once i went on birth control. because the return of my period was pill-induced, i’m not sure whether or not i would have gotten it back by now. however, a few moths ago my period went off the pill’s schedule, and started lasting longer than usual. my doctor agreed that this might be a sign of my body returning to its own cycle. but it’s difficult to be sure. anyway, i’ll let you know what my doctor has to say when i see him again next week. in the meantime, i will be trying to up my intake. as healthy as i appear and feel, i don’t want to be underweight. so rest assured that i will be doing my best to take care of my body and give it the nurturing that it deserves.

aside from giving you a recap after my doctor’s appointment, i don’t want to say anything else on here about weight. i want my blog to be a comfortable place for everyone to go to for the love of food. quite frankly i don’t really believe in calories. i don’t count them, and i don’t want them to be a subject on my blog…which is why i’ve never mentioned them before. hopefully i haven’t changed the cardioVEGsular vibe at all by asking you guys for tips on weight gain. i’m the same old food lovin’ me i’ve been all along. and get excited for a great food post tomorrow. today was filled with some good eats! 😉



6 Responses to “thank you!”

  1. Mitri Says:

    Hey I understand where you’re coming from– that it was NOT the expected ED. When I left for college, I was so excited to start eating “healthier” than my parents– especially because my school had great vegan and vegetarian options. I also was excited to use the school gym. I only lost a couple of lbs, but I was entering that mindset where I *had* to eat only certain healthy foods. I sometimes estimated calories, but really I would just deny myself food based on their “health” qualities.

    Eventually I started noticing some changes in my body– things that maybe weren’t obvious to others, but places where I thought, Wow I look more bony than I used to. ’cause eventually I’d cut out TOO many foods and was still trying to build up cardio strength. I didn’t have a goal of looking emaciated; I just wanted to be the definition of perfect health, almost like a machine.

    Now I didn’t lose enough to fall underweight, so I can’t specifically give you weight gain advice. I did lose my period for awhile, but it was also possibly a side effect from an antibiotic I was on, so it’s hard to say. My doctor made me wait a month after ending the medicine to see if my period would come back naturally before going onto a pill, so I’m kind of surprised yours didn’t do that.

    I’m really glad that you were willing to share this with us, especially since I feel like your situation sounds so much like mine 🙂 After 1/2 year of veganism, I did return to my dairy & egg whites because they were foods I’d loved but deprived myself of for “purity’s sake.” That seems to have helped me, but I completely understand how you’d want to remain vegan. I s’pose finding small ways to add more calorie-dense foods (calorie-heavy salad dressings, more dried fruits/nuts in stir-fries, extra nut butter helpings or smoothies, more dessert indulgences).

    Anytime you want to talk about this matter, I’m here for ya 😉 oaties gotta watch each otha’s backs.

  2. Shelby Says:

    I totally understand hun, no worries! I can tell you aren’t suffering from an ED because of how strong of a woman you are and because you have such a healthy relationship with your food. I hope you can find healthy ways to gain weight!

  3. Kailey Says:

    hey girlie 🙂
    You can tell that you don’t suffer from and ED so dont’ worry – you totally don’t sound like your coming off that way!! I think its great that you realize your weight is too low and YOU want to fix it 🙂 You rock!

  4. psychoj1 Says:

    I totally understand 🙂 I could tell you aren’t suffering from an ED. You didn’t sound like that. I think it’s SO COOL you can realize that you are too low and actually do something about it. That’s very admirable!
    ❤ jess

  5. meg Says:

    Oh, if you’re trying to add cals, can you stop using stevia (no calories) and replace it with agave or maple syrup? I know sugar gets a bad rap as being unhealthy, but maple syrup is actually very good for you– it’s quite high in iron and even has some calcium.

    P.S. Have you ever looked into orthorexia? It’s a very scary disease! I know I had/have it in some form (I’m recovering). I guess it doesn’t matter if you have an ed or not. What matters is that you’ve made a decision to take care of yourself. Kudos!

  6. Katie Says:

    Hello, I also appreciate that you have realized what you need to do about your health. I had an ED about a year ago that lasted a few months. My situation was a little bit different than yours in the fact that I wanted to lose weight and look “skinny”. But, when I got to that point of skinniness, I hated all of the looks and attention I got. I felt like everyone was staring and gaping at me. Not fun. I lost 25 pounds and got down to 100 lbs at the worst part of my ED. I couldn’t do any physical activity for a long period of time without feeling wiped out. I also took a lot of naps and had a bad attitude. I was a vegetarian at the time, but the ED didn’t come about because of me becoming a vegetarian. By being veg I wanted to preserve the earth, not emaciate my body. I feel like I am recovered quite well, but I still have thoughts or things that I don’t like about me every now and then. Becoming vegan has helped me discover just how important my body, mind, and health are. I have successfully gained weight back just by eating what I want (still keeping things healthy, of course) and not counting calories and fat grams. I used to be so obsessed with nutritional values that I would measure every little thing. I still measure, but only for recipes and cereals. But, it’s not down to the “T”, or anything obsessive like that.

    I am so glad that I have found bloggers who have gone through something like I have. It gives you hope for the future knowing that it is possible to stay away from an ED for the rest of your life if you only try and don’t worry about the not so important things in life. When I get down on myself, I just think that there are more important things in life. My mindset is healthy eating, living, laughter, and daily exercise. Whatever makes me happy, I do it.

    Sorry for this long post, but I like sharing my experience with others, especially people who understand. By the way, I love your blog and I respect you so much for sticking with veganism through your recovery and weight gain! 🙂

    Much love and support,

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